Breaking @fatroll News: We're a Hot Commodity for the Marrying Type
Not to rub it in, but my husband recognizes he is a pretty lucky dude to have me as his wife. I’m classy, adorable, have a great sense of humor, and I’m relatively smart about most topics.
And it turns out, because of his wonderful taste in a well-educated, smart and witty woman, he gets to live longer.
Yep. When he is 90-years-old and he is sick and tired of my bullshit about picking up after himself and my neurotic behavior around essentially every component of his life sends him over the edge, he’ll have me to thank.
A recent Swedish study has found that men who live longer are typically married to smart women. This is due to the fact that we actually pay attention to things that matter — like a healthy lifestyle — instead of ESPN.
Swedish scientists have discovered that long life and good health have nothing to do with a man’s education and everything to do with his wife’s. Men married to smart women live longer… It’s simply our skill at processing advice about healthy lifestyles, and passing it on. All it boils down to is that “educated” married women have long since banned their men from eating pork pies at every other meal.
You’re welcome, love. When I changed your diet from only meat and potatoes to a love of veggies and a variety of healthy food, I did you a favor. And you get to thank me for the next 72 years. I prefer diamonds, by the way.
